Home study draft is DONE!

Whohoo...the forever-long taking, much stress inducing, endlessly prayed about home study draft is finished!

For those of you who aren't familiar with it, the home study report is the long document that a social worker drafts about your family after meeting with you approximately 3 times. They are the ones who have all of the verified paperwork and fingerprints that we ran around for over a month to gather (and then waited for 3 months for Matt's final forms to come in). You have to answer all of these questions about how you grew up, what you like to do, how you and your spouse communicate, and every possible question about parenting. Even though you feel like you've written every last detail of your life for this person to look over, when you get the final report you feel like you're reading about a total stranger. It's really weird! Random events from your life, results of police reports (before you call me Mom & Dad, I'm clean!) and little comments that you made here and there are strung together like it's you in a nutshell. As I read it I really wished I had been more eloquent...it's hard to see this stuff in black and white! We had an amazing social worker who, thankfully, liked us and did a great job on the report...but it's really odd all the same. All I could think was, "Yikes, I'm SO lame!"

All of this has just made me even more appreciative that we have such a huge God who still takes the time to know each of us fully, individually, personally and completely. He doesn't rely on some synopsized version of us that He refers to like a doctor's chart (or home study report!) Even more than that, He doesn't expect or require us to be able to speak clearly or eloquently when we present ourselves and our requests to Him. He doesn't really even need words since He knows more about us than we even do ourselves, and yet when He gets them, or our still presence before Him, He translates them into His glorious, perfect words - He cleans us up and makes us beautiful!  I don't ever have to worry that He got the wrong impression of me, but even when I screw up big time and wish He would, He loves me all the same. Sometimes it's at those times when we have made big mistakes that we can feel His loving arms around us most clearly, and He pulls us close and holds us tight and whispers in our ears that He won't let go of us. Thank you so much Lord, that I am not reduced to my ineloquent human words in Your eyes!

Oh Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, oh Lord. -Psalm 139:1-4